As many of you know I've had some significant fears and shall we say 'reservations' about the field I'm preparing to enter and the nature of the work I'll be doing. I think the R-rated movie analogy is probably the most succinct in capturing the dilemma: If therapy is an R-rated movie (as I have heard it described to me and can somewhat understand in my limited experience, at least as far as content goes), how/why do I want to go there? Lover of light and other uplifting things that I am, I was (and still am at times) terrified by the prospect of becoming a therapist and listening to really dark stuff day in and day out. There, context established.
So I was reading this book about pornography addiction and recovery and then decided I'd take a shower tonight rather than in the morning since I see my first client at 8:00 in the am! I was in one of those good moods where you just start singing almost without thinking and ended up going through a few songs starting with "I love to see the temple" and ending with "Come Thou Fount." But it was kind of sad because I didn't know all the words like I wanted to! So I got to thinking (as I am prone to do) and decided I would like to learn the primary songs better, for several reasons but I'll mention two. First, I want to be well-versed in them and have them in my arsenal, so to speak (that sounds so extreme!) for when I'm a mom and can use them to soothe and teach my children. I love the power and comfort of music and love love love the Spirit it invites--which leads to my second reason! I want to protect and nurture that uplifting influence of the Spirit in my life (especially in light of becoming a therapist and the necessity of hearing/seeing/reading some things I'd often rather not spend my time thinking about).
I should clarify. I've been really blessed and it hasn't been like I feared. In fact, it's actually pretty cool. All my fears about the things clients would talk about--well I got a lot of those issues in the first week. And it turns out, it's fine! I'm fine! We're all fine! And singing primary songs? Well, I think it helps and will help, for life in general!
P.S. So I didn't anticipate doing this, but I think I'm going to turn this blog private. I know, I'm sorry. But you're all invited! (or I guess I should say you will all be invited). Now that I'm seeing clients and this is google-able, which makes me google-able...it just seems like it would be best for the sake of boundaries and safety. Make sense?